I'm tapped out, I'm spent.

 I just can't get hard. I was sick one the weekend. I am lazy, fat couch potato. I'm so tired. I wanna hit the gym but that place looks like an alien landscape full of dangerous torture devices. I have no idea what to do. I get tired easily now. I changed after chemo, but didn't want to admit it. 

She was bugging me all day. I've been putting off getting with this girl for a while, but she was real pushy. So, after I got home, I fell asleep on the couch. After her trying to get me to go pick her up, I eventually ignored her. I fell asleep for a few hours. I woke up and took a shower. Now that it was getting late, I finally caved and went to pick her up. 

She was waiting for me and when she got into the car, she had in jeans and a sweater. What I wasn't expecting was her undoing to show me her bra and no shirt underneath. I pulled over onto the side of the road, and she started blowing me. Just as I got hard, she jumps out of the car, squats down and urinates. She jumps back in ready to go, but by then I lost my hard on. I couldn't get it back. She was sexy enough, but no amount of blowing, jerking, or anything in between was gonna wake him back up. Maybe I was still sick. The doc put me on some new pills for an infection. Maybe it was Justice fucking me dry every night for the past week. Maybe I was just tired. I don't know. She didn't care. If anything, she didn't want to fuck anymore, because at this point my attempted sticking and stirring her nether regions produced three orgasms for her. She complained that her pussy was overly sensitive and that she was done. That's the problem with getting girls to cum. Sure it sounds fun, and you can even take pride especially if you're a young guy. However, the reality is that girls are like guys. When they cum, they are done with you. girls usually come in short, three or four bursts, and then want you to fuck off. At that point you either cum too or yer outta there.

Earlier that day, I stopped to pick up the cousin, but she was too busy getting high in her RV to give me the time of day. I quickly left. I thought that by nighttime, I might be inn the mood, I wasn't. I'm older now. Out of shape. Tired. And drained. I don't want to resort to ED pills. My only other option is to recover. My biggest problem is that I don’t desire women like I did when I was a teenager. They don’t excite me. It’s almost like a chore. One man gets horny he has to do something about it. You see as a teenager you desire women, because you can’t have them. They are out of reach. You fantasize about them. But now, it’s like eating a big meal and then someone inviting you to go out to eat at a nice restaurant. No matter how good the chef, how delicious the food, You just don’t want to eat. I'm full.